I think I once said here that am able to emphatise with people and their problems. I understand when they are unhappy or sad and perhaps even why. However I am still unable to understand myself. The last person I am unable to comprehend is myself and so thats why I get depressed at times.

It gets worst. When I see someone whos just broods for too long it hurts me bad as well. I can see the pain inside him but I can’t do anything. Everytime I try to talk to him, all I get is the cold treatment. For crying out loud, if he cant talk to me who else can he turn to? It hurts to see him go through the same emptiness that slowly eats inside of me. I found a way to cope. I blog to cope. As of yet, he has not found a coping mechanism to get out of the funk hes in. It seems so ironic that last time he was advicing me on a similar problem last time and now somehow he is unable to cope with it. Such irony I did not wish to see.

My coping mechanisms, flawed as they may be at least gave me the will to at least give a smile. That at least is a breakthrough is it not? What is the point of moping around generally being very very unhappy and unfriendly? He may not realise it but his whole mood affects the people around him even though he keeps to himself. The further he draws into himself, it seems the darker the atmosphere becomes.

What really hurts me is that he refuses to talk to me. Is it because I seem to have a big mouth? Is it because of the age difference? Or perhaps it is my perceived immaturity? I cant stand it. It hurts to see someone who refuses help when he looks like he is drowning.